Group Chat Chaos

The Jujutsu High group chat had become a cursed object in its own right—an endless source of chaos, missed calls, and questionable memes. It started innocently enough: Itadori Yuji, with his boundless energy, created a group titled "Sorcerer Squad" and added everyone he could think of. Fushiguro Megumi barely glanced at his phone before muting it. Okkotsu Yuta, ever polite, sent a quick "Hello everyone!" followed by an emoji of a smiley face. Inumaki Toge responded with a single "Salmon" to indicate approval. Kamo Noritoshi, the only one who took this seriously, typed, "Kindly refrain from spamming. This should be for mission coordination only."

But Yuji had other plans.

Yuji: guys guys guys Yuji: i just had the best idea Yuji: we should have a friendship day Kamo: That is not a mission. Yuji: it’s a bonding mission!! Megumi: No. Yuji: see megumi agrees Megumi: I said no. Yuji: that’s what i meant

Yuta chuckled to himself as he read the exchange. He was sitting in his dorm, Rika humming contentedly nearby. His thumbs hovered over the keyboard. He typed:

Yuta: I think it could be fun. What did you have in mind? Yuji: YES! thank you yuta! okay so we all go out for food, maybe karaoke? inumaki can do his thing Inumaki: Tuna tuna? (Translation: Karaoke?) Yuji: exactly! Kamo: I have training. Megumi: Same. Yuji: see that’s the problem you guys train too much. you need to relax! take a break! Megumi: I relax by training. Kamo: That is not relaxing.

It went on for an hour. Yuji kept suggesting activities; Megumi and Kamo kept shutting them down. Yuta tried to mediate, but his gentle encouragements were no match for the stubbornness of two sorcerers who would rather fight curses than engage in forced socialization. Inumaki, meanwhile, communicated only through rice ball ingredients: "Bonito flakes" meant disapproval, "Salmon" meant yes, and "Shake" meant something in between.

Eventually, Yuji tried a new angle.

Yuji: megumi, what if i use a binding vow? Megumi: Don’t. Yuji: too late i did it. vow: you come to friendship day and i won’t eat your last slice of pizza ever again Megumi: That’s not how binding vows work. Yuji: sure it is Kamo: It really isn’t. Yuji: kamo you’re next. binding vow: you come or i tell everyone about the time you Kamo: I will attend. Yuji: HAHA thought so

Megumi sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He could already picture Yuji’s smug grin. But a small, traitorous part of him was curious about what Yuji had on Kamo. He’d ask later.

As the chat devolved into Yuji threatening to share embarrassing secrets, Yuta noticed Inumaki went quiet. He sent a private DM.

Yuta: Toge? You okay? Inumaki: Salmon. (I’m fine.) Yuta: You’re not saying much in the group. Is something wrong? Inumaki: Bonito flakes. (Just tired.) Yuta: If you want to talk, I’m here.

A pause. Then:

Inumaki: Shake. (Thanks.)

Yuta smiled. He had always found it easy to understand Inumaki, even without the translations. Their bond had grown stronger during the Sendai colony arc, and now they often gravitated toward each other in quiet moments. Maybe Yuji’s friendship day wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

Back in the main chat, Megumi had unexpectedly shifted tactics.

Megumi: Fine. One hour. No karaoke. Yuji: YES!! wait no karaoke? but yuta wanted to sing Yuta: I... I don’t mind. Megumi: Public singing is a form of torture. Yuji: megumi you’re just shy. i bet you have a beautiful voice Megumi: I will end this chat. Kamo: An admirable threat.

But Megumi didn’t leave. Yuji noticed. And maybe—just maybe—Megumi stayed because Yuji was being relentlessly cheerful, because the distractions were a break from the heavy weight of being a sorcerer, because Yuji’s texts were laced with an affection that made his chest feel tight. Not that he’d ever admit it.

They settled on a compromise: a group dinner at a small curry place Yuji had found. Kamo agreed only after hearing it served traditional Kyoto-style curry, which he deemed acceptable. Inumaki sent a “Salmon” and a thumbs-up. Yuta offered to pick up anyone who needed a ride.

Yuji: perfection. this is going to be the best friendship day ever Yuji: megumi you’re gonna have so much fun you’ll thank me Megumi: I doubt it. Yuji: i’ll make you thank me Megumi: How? Yuji: by being my super fun self 💪

The reply was a single word: “Idiot.” But Yuji knew it was said with fondness. He grinned at his screen, feeling warm.

Later that night, after the plan was finalized, Yuta and Inumaki stayed up talking in whispers through text. Yuta mentioned how the group chat reminded him of the old days, before everything became so serious. Inumaki agreed, and they shared a moment of quiet understanding.

Yuta: Toge, I’m glad we’re all here. Including the group chat nonsense. Inumaki: Salmon. (Me too.) Yuta: Maybe I’ll sing at dinner. Only if you promise to do your thing. Inumaki: Tuna tuna? (You want me to curse the food?) Yuta: No! I meant your special… presence. It makes things better. Inumaki: Shake… (That’s sweet.) Yuta: I mean it.

There was a long pause. Then Inumaki sent a single emoji: a star. Yuta’s heart did a little flip.

The next day, the group gathered at the curry place. It started awkwardly—Kamo analyzing the menu with scholarly precision, Megumi staring at the wall as if it held the secrets of the universe, Yuji talking a mile a minute, and Inumaki occasionally grunting in approval. Yuta smiled, watching them all.

Halfway through the meal, Yuji raised his glass of water.

Yuji: A toast! To the sorcerer squad! May we always annoy each other and kick curse butt. Kamo: That is not a proper toast. Megumi: It’s better than most of his ideas. Yuta: I think it’s perfect. Inumaki: Salmon!

They clinked glasses—or, in Inumaki’s case, a bottle of soda. Yuji caught Megumi’s eye and gave him a wink. Megumi looked away, but the tips of his ears turned pink.

Back in the group chat later that night, Yuji typed a recap.

Yuji: BEST DAY EVER. thanks for coming guys. especially you megumi 😘 Megumi: Delete that. Yuji: never Kamo: I am leaving this chat. Kamo: …But it was acceptable. Yuta: It was lovely. Toge agrees. Inumaki: Salmon.

And for once, even the most serious sorcerers felt a little lighter, bound not by curses or missions, but by friendship—and a group chat that refused to die.